What would you do?

[Fruitcake]

I'm in need of some advice! Please be honest......

Would you let your 16 year old (17 in July) DS go to the Isle of Wight Festival? He would be with one other 17 year old friend, plus some of this friend's friends.

He really wants to go as Stevie Wonder, who is DS' idol, is going to be there.

I'm horrified by the thought of him going, especially as he's not particulatly good in large crowds, hates being around people who've been drinking, and is dead against drugs! He is also very young-looking for his age, and I think he'll just get eaten alive!

On the other hand, this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to see his Stevie W live, as he is now in his 60s and there are no UK tours on the horizon.

Heeeelp!

[Flosmom]

I'd go with him.

Enjoy!

Deb x

[riverdancefan]

I would do as Deb recommended ,
go with him and enjoy it too.
Failing that I am afraid i think 16-17 is too young for a weekend stay at the OIW festival, given that you have mentioned so many things he is not comfortable with, especially crowds.
I did not allow my oldest DS to go to the V festival last year, he is going this year now and will be 18 when he goes. He wouldn't have been mature enough to deal with other people or to say no, even if he wanted to, that was my main worry.
and there is drinking and lots of it!
It's about handling yourself and staying safe and feeling comfortable in a festival environment and to be honest it does not sound as if he would.... but you know him best.

[Genevieve]

I disagree - He's just at the age when most go - my dd went to Reading,, and despite having reservations,I was initially against it, like you for same reasons, but the security at these things is very good, he'll mix with who he's with, and the grounds are so vast, hes not going to be in the thick of the crowds at the front by the stage if he doesn't want to after all.....and consider that at these festivals its so expensive even for mineral water and food, and he won't go there to seek out buying alcohol !! Group of my dds friends went to Isle of Wight,, had a great time, the journey there is full of young people going, and I'd worry more about having a decent tent that won't let rain in to be honest ...and wellies in case of mud !!! they don't tend to change their clothes unless they get wet and muddy though and a lot of rain !!! pong !!
Really, don't worry, he'll have a great experience which is what its all about at this age,, and if I've let my dd go .... say no more !..., I am the most paranoid out of all the mums I know I can tell you !! There are points to charge your mobile phone too, so I kept in regular contact with my dd and when her mobile was running low on battery, I'd given her another just in case and had her friends mobile numbers to ensure I had contact... My ds's friends have worked at lots of festivals, including Isle of WIght and the security is very very good. They have patrols all night around the grounds, tent areas etc !

[Grace125]

I think it depends on the child and on the festival. I think you know your own child and I'm sure he will respect you whatever decision you make.

Isn't it Bestival though that has Stevie Wonder rather the Isle of Wight Festival? I only know as I was very tempted myself to try and persuade my friends/sister to go (I'm 23 though)! I think Bestival has a lot more other stuff going on for all ages like Glasto does, as opposed to Leeds or Reading (which also has a bit of a rep for trouble-though my friends who have been have never had any problems)

[Genevieve]

yes..Bestival is the name of the festival at Isle of Wight -and you get more families going to Bestival, as you do Glastonbury... than say Leeds and Reading festivals. So in that respect, its better probably for younger teens as theres so much going on apart from the music !
As long as you keep your money on you when you leave your tents, for obvious reasons because you never know... - and they'll be a ffew of them pitching next to eachother no doubt, even better....just don't pitch your tent right on the very outside of the grounds and too far away from the loos etc !!! - they just get on with enjoying the experience -
My ds's friends have been working at festivals for the past 5 years, ...I spoke to some of them, because I was concerned before I let dd go, and I called the organisers too !!! - but there was no trouble of any degree at either Reading or at the Isle of Wight that they dealt with !!! dd and her friends were the sort of teens who just went for the experience and the music, like 99% who go there and they all mentioned how good the 24 hr security presence was at these places....along with how expensive the food was ! You have to trust your dd or ds really, and the friends they're going with. Try and speak to a friend of your ds who's been before ? and give the organisers a call from the website to gain an idea about the security etc if you're concerned, you won't be the first who's called them !

[paulears]

My son did his first festival at 16 and was fine. They can misbehave if they feel like it anywhere - so that's not the issue. Sure there will be people doing drugs and drinking - but I guess he knows this type at school anyway.

As advised, he just needs to take very little with him, keep safe and have a good time. While some mums/sons would like the idea of going together, my son would die of embarrassment if his mum had gone with him.

If he is a sensible lad, let him go. Mates of similar type tend to be security anyway as they keep together. 17 this year, 18 next. He could have wanted to join the Army - and that would have been a much more difficult decision.

When I was teaching we took a load of students to Paris, and let them loose with meet up instructions for getting back to the coach. We started at the Eifell Tower. The 18 and 19 year olds were off to see the sights straight away on the Metro. The street wise 16 and 17 yr olds walked across the bridge to go to the posh shops, while the shyer 16 year olds stayed in a big group within sight of the top of the tower. Back in the UK, all these kids consider themselves grown up. Going away to a festival with friends is the same thing. They'll stick together and be fine.

[riverdancefan]

There you go then, mine is a lone view, but like I said, you know him best, however there will be crowds for certain, as long as he is prepared for that, as a Glastonbury attendee over many years , they don't phase me, but I can see how some youngsters wouldn't be too comfortable........

[Flosmom]

I'd still go with him - in fact, now I know Stevie Wonder is playing, I might be tempted to go anyway!

Deb x

[Genevieve]

I have always thought the year they turn 17 and over is absolutely fine - (many dds friends were allowed to go at 16 their GCSE year)
...but I couldn't think of anything I'd rather not do than go to a festival I've been as a teenager..and I wouldnt have wanted my parents there !
But at Glastonbury, a friend of mine went with her young children, and there was a young couple in the tent next to them who kept them awake aaaallll night
...it could be worse... your ds could be asking to go to the festival they all seem to go to now in Spain !

[riverdancefan]

I was 15 I think when I saw stevie wonder.... The same year I was lucky enough to see Bob Marley as well, I would LOVE to see SW again... The man is beyond talent!!!!! Incredible!!

[Fruitcake]

Thanks so much everyone for your advice.

DS would definitely not want me with him, unfortunayely.........would love to see Stevie!

I'll let you all know what happens.........I have to say that if he really pushes then I shall probably let him go. You only live once, I suppose!

[tikka]

I think my ds would be mortified if his mum went too......but I would let him go if I felt confident he could look after himself and trusted the friend he was going with. I think that the main thing would be who was going with him!

hope he enjoys it.

tikka

[jasmine2]

why not let him go, and also go to the IOW but stay elsewhere.......so if there is a problem at least you are near ( small island with beautiful things to see and do)...good luck with your decision xx

[JTBmum]

Ds went to Reading last year when he was 16, nearly 17. He is quite sensible, and quite a few others went. He had the best time.