Getting a bit excited making plans for September

[Katymac]

DD has worked out I'll get upset if we drive& leave her there, so she has decided:

We go down in the car the weekend before & drop all her luggage & set up her room, then come home

Then the next weekend she just goes off on the train (with her overnight bag) as if she were going to Saturday Associates (but maybe a bit later) so neither of us get upset

She knows me so well!!

Oh & she has packed 4 tins of custard, some towels and some storage boxes already!

[sapphire]

What a sensible plan! It is hard when they go .... but wonderful to see them thriving as they do what they love!

[2dancersmum]

You might find that even worse as it just makes the goodbye process last even longer and builds it up even more for the goodbye. We took DD, helped her do her room, went out for a meal and then left her - with her room mate having arrived and final sorting of her room to do - to keep her busy. I kept a smile on my face until our car was out of sight and then had a cry on the way home. One thing I did tell DD in advance though was that I was not going to ring, text, email her without her prompting me to do so. I did not want to be interrupting her or disturbing her as she settled in and made friends as I did not want her to be seen as the one with the 'clingy' mum and even more importantly I did not want to make her homesick. It was better for DD if she chose when to make contact. The first few weeks/months can be very hard but it is worth it when you see them so happy and thriving. My DD had a really bad room mate - a 16 year old who watched tv until 2 or 3 am, got drunk several times a week (mostly staying at friends those nights) and basically had no consideration for anyone so initially it was very hard for DD out of college - but the daytime in college made it more than worth it. Good luck for September

[carriecrafts]

That sounds like a good plan Katymac, I like that

When my eldest DD moved to uni in London I had to keep telling myself she wasn't leaving home, she was just going on a residential course, so it didn't feel so overwhelming - she's about to graduate and is staying in London so I can't kid myself any more but I'm used to it now (still miss her though).
x

[Katymac]

Hopefully we will cope as instead of spending the weekend in London & the week at home - she will spend the week away & be home for the weekends (at least initially)

But who knows....

[2dancersmum]

Katymac - you will do more than just cope. However much you miss your DD it is worth it when you can see how much they blossom from doing what they love all day long. Your DD is setting off on a very exciting journey and you will still be very much part of it, even if you no longer see her every day. I would keep it very flexible for weekends also as your DD is likely to get very tired at first and may want extra sleep. My DD did not make it home until half term and I think she slept in until gone 11am every day she was home. Bear in mind too that some weekends she may want to socialise with her new friends. But all in all a very exciting time ahead.

[bop2thetop]

I've been thinking a lot about this to. My DD said she's going to come home every weekend. We have said she can because if it makes her feel better about leaving that's fine. But we realise that coming home weekend probably won't last very long. I I would rather she was settled and happy. It's a tough thing that us parents have to go through.. I would like to think of it like Carriecrafts said that she is on a residential so that we all find it less daunting. That's a good way of looking at it. I like that. We're all so lucky we have such talented children that have got on to these wonderful courses. We can do this!

[jasmine2]

we are lucky enough to live within a 40 minutes direct train commute for Bodyworks, so DD will be travelling everyday ...much cheaper too,,,,so excited..x

[suesmith]

jasmine2 - we are like you dd will have a 35 minute train journey to Laine I am really happy as she is only 16 and we were not eligible for Dada so at least its one area we can make a saving in - although I'm sure over the next few years she will want to be living away like the others

[Pearl]

Sue Smith your dd is very lucky going to Laines, we saw the end of year show and was blown away by the talent!! Good luck to her

[suesmith]

Thanks Pearl - yes she is very lucky to be going to her first choice of college, we saw the show too and loved it, she was actually a bit tearful I think it suddenly hit her that in a few months time she will be going there and have to come up to that standard!!
i think your journey begins next school year - fingers crossed your dd gets the college of her dreams too

[carriecrafts]

Finally sorted accommodation, 2 months today is first day at Urdang!

[carriecrafts]

Spoke too soon
Some London letting agents are unscrupulous Paid £1000 deposit yesterday, today they rang to say they have a higher offer and have now re-listed the flat for £50 per week more than we agreed while still lying to me that they are waiting for confirmation from the owner.
Now we are stuck, we can't withdraw or we will lose the deposit, so we just have to wait for them to either accept our original agreement or decline us and return the deposit.

[Caroline A-C]

OMG that is evil - is it legal even? Hope things resolve themselves soon.

[lostouthere]

That doesn't sound right, legally I mean. I imagine if you paid a deposit it must have been a contract for a particular rent. They surely can't bind you to lose the deposit while also changing the terms and putting the rent up? Do you have a CAB nearby?