DS (8) has always loved performing and we've had lovely comments from parents and drama teachers about his ability and attitude. He's taken part in performances at the local theatre. But, we made a decision a while ago, that we didn't want him to become any sort of child star. I know that its a hard business and this kind of thing is probably not likely anyway, but we just wanted to avoid going down that road because of the kind of thing you see with child stars having a hard time dealing with success and then failure.
Then, yesterday an agent spotted DS at his drama class. She asked to see me at the end of class (and nobody else, although some others are already represented by her). She told me that she spotted him immediately and said lots of complimentary stuff about him and that he was something special and she'd love to represent him. Also, somebody from Spotlight had seen him and was really keen on signing him. It really shouldn't alter our original opinions on the subject, but I am really having an internal debate with myself.
I know that being with an agent doesn't equal A list actor, but I think if you sign up then you are accepting the possibility.
What are others' opinions on child stardom? Is it something that worries you?
BTW - DS didn't hear the conversation but was really keen to join the agency and would relish any opportunities that come his way.
Child star worries
Moderator: busybusybusy
Re: Child star worries
I had similar worries as you and like your DS my DD was always getting comments, praise etc. We decided that she would only do amateur and local stuff - partly because I had the same concerns that you seem to have but also practically it would not have bene possible as neither myself or DH had the sort of job where we could drop everything to go to castings etc. I was also worried that it may have impacted on my other (non-performing) DD. I also did not want her to have the experience of success/failure at a young age. She was however very busy with classes, school productions and local shows.
She is now in full time vocational acting college in London so it clearly did not have a negative impact on her
Interestingly hardly any of her co-students had done any proffessional work either.
I must add I am not judging anyone else's decision. This is just what we decided, other will have very different views.
She is now in full time vocational acting college in London so it clearly did not have a negative impact on her
Interestingly hardly any of her co-students had done any proffessional work either. I must add I am not judging anyone else's decision. This is just what we decided, other will have very different views.
The highway's jammed with broken heroes on a last chance power drive.
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riverdancefan
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Re: Child star worries
I think lots of us would love to have that worry!!
I think you only hear about the child" stars " that have problems, for each one of those there are 100 who are very well rounded and pretty much ordinary.
If your child was lucky enough to get a huge break then you could make sure their feet stayed firmly on the ground and to be brutal, the chances of that happening are very small indeed as you already said. Many of our huge stars acted as children, Keira knightly, Kate Winslett, phil Collins, Kate beckinsale, and they all seem to be pretty much sane .
He can take his chance with an agent, 8 is a good age , hopefully he might do well, treat it as a hobby, he will gave loads of fun,and make sure he can cope with the rejection and you won't go far wrong , when he is cast in the next blockbuster, see how you feel then
There are 100s of children chasing every role and you have to realistic and in it to win it!
I know how talented my son is, but I know there might be another boy just around the corner with another agent who is twice as good.......
School work and performing arts is a difficult balance to achieve as well.....
I think you only hear about the child" stars " that have problems, for each one of those there are 100 who are very well rounded and pretty much ordinary.
If your child was lucky enough to get a huge break then you could make sure their feet stayed firmly on the ground and to be brutal, the chances of that happening are very small indeed as you already said. Many of our huge stars acted as children, Keira knightly, Kate Winslett, phil Collins, Kate beckinsale, and they all seem to be pretty much sane .
He can take his chance with an agent, 8 is a good age , hopefully he might do well, treat it as a hobby, he will gave loads of fun,and make sure he can cope with the rejection and you won't go far wrong , when he is cast in the next blockbuster, see how you feel then
There are 100s of children chasing every role and you have to realistic and in it to win it!
I know how talented my son is, but I know there might be another boy just around the corner with another agent who is twice as good.......
School work and performing arts is a difficult balance to achieve as well.....
"Tall and proud my mother taught me, this is how we dance" - RIVERDANCE
Re: Child star worries
You can cross that bridge when you come to it. As other NAPMs have said, its not a likely outcome, but I gues it's not unmanageable if it happens.
But if your DS is going to take up performing arts as a hobby (and - agent or not - it makes sense to see it as something to do for fun at that age - why else would an 8 year old do anything?) you need to ask yourself some searching questions. That's because you need to be 100% behind him. Its incredibly demanding for the parents, as we are their PA, taxi service, costume provider and general support system. It's not cheap, either. If you don't want to do this, or simply can't make it work because of other commitments (including other kids with other, equally demanding hobbies like football or pony riding) then you might want to steer him towards other, more self-contained pastimes. My life would be significantly easier if my girls were into stamp collecting or video gaming, for example.
Of course, you'll always have the 'what if...' question to answer.
Hope this helps
Deb x
But if your DS is going to take up performing arts as a hobby (and - agent or not - it makes sense to see it as something to do for fun at that age - why else would an 8 year old do anything?) you need to ask yourself some searching questions. That's because you need to be 100% behind him. Its incredibly demanding for the parents, as we are their PA, taxi service, costume provider and general support system. It's not cheap, either. If you don't want to do this, or simply can't make it work because of other commitments (including other kids with other, equally demanding hobbies like football or pony riding) then you might want to steer him towards other, more self-contained pastimes. My life would be significantly easier if my girls were into stamp collecting or video gaming, for example.
Of course, you'll always have the 'what if...' question to answer.
Hope this helps
Deb x
Re: Child star worries
i think you need to be guided by your child. my ds who is 7 is very sporty so has other things happening in his life besides acting.
also with sport he is used to winning and loosing,and used to doing things again and again and again to get something right!!
he doesn't do any amature/theater work as he would rather do sport but he loves acting and learning scripts!!
when he attends auditions and doesn't get the part we discuss why,as in "did you notice all the other boys were smaller than you!"
or "it depends on what the other brother that they are casting looks like" or "maybe they will choose an older boy for a longer licence"!
for this reason he has never taken anything personally.
he is also fully aware of his bank account and loves that fact that he has money in there!!and he has treated himself to a few things
that he wanted!!
i personally dont worry about him becoming a child star,we treat it as a hobby and its a hobby he loves!
we originally decided to give it a years trial and see what happened and he has had some amazing experiences so far!
also with sport he is used to winning and loosing,and used to doing things again and again and again to get something right!!
he doesn't do any amature/theater work as he would rather do sport but he loves acting and learning scripts!!
when he attends auditions and doesn't get the part we discuss why,as in "did you notice all the other boys were smaller than you!"
or "it depends on what the other brother that they are casting looks like" or "maybe they will choose an older boy for a longer licence"!
for this reason he has never taken anything personally.
he is also fully aware of his bank account and loves that fact that he has money in there!!and he has treated himself to a few things
that he wanted!!
i personally dont worry about him becoming a child star,we treat it as a hobby and its a hobby he loves!
we originally decided to give it a years trial and see what happened and he has had some amazing experiences so far!
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Irishdancer
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Re: Child star worries
DS was a regular in EastEnders from the age of 4 till he was 6 at the age of 9 he got the part of Tommy in Cbeebies Tommy Zoom he has been lead boy in over 20 adverts and had small parts in 2 feature films and and 5 TV programs. He had a great time but I have always tried to keep his feet on the floor, I would not allow any one to call him a little star, he is a little boy who act I hate it when people said that to him, he did say to me once I'm a star mummy as he had heard people say to him to which I got very cross with him and told him he was a normal boy who acted and did some thing he enjoyed did not want to think he was a star, when we where filming and we had a trailer I made him stand with all he extras we could have gone to the fount of the cue or stay in are trailer and runner would have brought the food to us, I wanted him to mix with every one. He is now 14 and dose not get very much but I encourage him to do other things as well as acting, he is now a very good golfer so spends his time playing golf all the time so dose not think much about acting. He dose go for auditions but dose not get much now unlike when he was younger where he got most of the things he went for, he goes to the audition and never asks about if we have heard as he knows that he probaly wont hear. He had a great time wile it lasted meet some great people who we are still friendly with, did things he would not have done if he had not been a child actor, so yes it is worth doing all you need to do is keep your child'sfeet on the ground let them know that they are children don't let them get too big a head if they do get some thing big, no one likes children who think are better than every one else.
Re: Child star worries
What a lot of great advice and opinions. Thanks to everybody! It has really given me a lot to think about. DS really loves to throw himself into everything he does and i know he would get a lot out of the experience. It would be incredibly inconvenient for the rest of the family, but I like wizzymo's idea of giving it a year. DS is quite cute at the moment, so it might be worth giving it a go while he's young and then at least he's had the experience.
He has two theatre productions taking him up to May, so we wouldn't sign up to an agency until after that anyway. I'll let you know what we decide!
He has two theatre productions taking him up to May, so we wouldn't sign up to an agency until after that anyway. I'll let you know what we decide!
Re: Child star worries
Sorry - bit late coming into this!
We were encouraged to get DS a professional agent when he was 7 after a couple of local theatre successes, and he was taken on by a very reputable London agent.
We spent years trailing up and down to London for auditions (we are on the South Coast), and he was lucky enough to do a bit of TV and film work, and managed to land himself a major WE role at the age of 8, and another WE role just over a year later, which, in the end, we turned down (long story!).
We always went with what DS wanted to do, and if he didn't want to attend a certain audition, for whatever reason, then we wouldn't go. We always endeavoured to make the travelling part of the whole experience, and treated the whole thing as a huge adventure.
The WE show was a HUGE commitment - very tiring, very expensive and totally dominated our lives for over a year.
When DS was 11, he just turned to me on the morning of a big film audition and said "I don't want to go. In fact, I don't want to do this any more." Within 5 minutes I had called the agent and taken him off their books.
However, DS (and DH and I) have had some AMAZING experiences, and none of us would change that for the world. He is a 'seasoned' traveller, totally at ease in the company of adults, can walk into a room full of strangers and feel quite comfortable just being himself, and is totally prepared for job interviews and all the rejection and disappointment life will inevitably throw at him.
He is now at College studying music............something he may never have discovered if we hadn't allowed him to buy one 'big' thing with his earnings (he chose a drum kit!!).
So, my advice would be to be very realistic when considering the commitment you will be taking on. Castings are usually offered at relatively short notice (sometimes less than 24 hours) and, if he is lucky enough to land a part, whether in theatre or film/TV, it is HARD WORK! Having said all that, however, it is also a fantastic adventure and a great life experience for any child.
You know your DS and your situation better than anyone. Only you can decide whether you are prepared to embark on a journey down this particular road. Good luck with whatever you decide. And , remember - even if he does get the chance to audition for a major, potentially life-changing, role, you can always decide not to let him audition.
We were encouraged to get DS a professional agent when he was 7 after a couple of local theatre successes, and he was taken on by a very reputable London agent.
We spent years trailing up and down to London for auditions (we are on the South Coast), and he was lucky enough to do a bit of TV and film work, and managed to land himself a major WE role at the age of 8, and another WE role just over a year later, which, in the end, we turned down (long story!).
We always went with what DS wanted to do, and if he didn't want to attend a certain audition, for whatever reason, then we wouldn't go. We always endeavoured to make the travelling part of the whole experience, and treated the whole thing as a huge adventure.
The WE show was a HUGE commitment - very tiring, very expensive and totally dominated our lives for over a year.
When DS was 11, he just turned to me on the morning of a big film audition and said "I don't want to go. In fact, I don't want to do this any more." Within 5 minutes I had called the agent and taken him off their books.
However, DS (and DH and I) have had some AMAZING experiences, and none of us would change that for the world. He is a 'seasoned' traveller, totally at ease in the company of adults, can walk into a room full of strangers and feel quite comfortable just being himself, and is totally prepared for job interviews and all the rejection and disappointment life will inevitably throw at him.
He is now at College studying music............something he may never have discovered if we hadn't allowed him to buy one 'big' thing with his earnings (he chose a drum kit!!).
So, my advice would be to be very realistic when considering the commitment you will be taking on. Castings are usually offered at relatively short notice (sometimes less than 24 hours) and, if he is lucky enough to land a part, whether in theatre or film/TV, it is HARD WORK! Having said all that, however, it is also a fantastic adventure and a great life experience for any child.
You know your DS and your situation better than anyone. Only you can decide whether you are prepared to embark on a journey down this particular road. Good luck with whatever you decide. And , remember - even if he does get the chance to audition for a major, potentially life-changing, role, you can always decide not to let him audition.
Don't count your chickens until the contract's in your hand!
Re: Child star worries
I think everyone is putting forward very valid comments and advice but only you and your child can know for sure what is right for them. We have all had the dilemmas around do we / dont we, will it be too much for them and so forth.
My DD has been singing, dancing and acting since she was 3 - she is now nearly 9. Up until a couple of years ago, it was purely her stage school shows, or stuff they did in the community or dance festivals. her acting then started to really shine through, so we made a decision for her to remain at the stage school she was at as they are really really strong on dance, and for her to attend a different one for singing, drama and musical theatre. Best of breed approach I suppose.
Her musical theatre stage school acts as a sub agent and is aligned with one of the agencies based in Pinewood., They get lots of 'extras' work as well as the kids going further. From talking with the other parents there and seeing how much fun all the kids had we made the decision for her sign up.
In the last 18 months she has had an absolute ball and it would never even enter her mind that it was 'work'. She has worked with Daniel Radcliffe, done her first screen death, been a ghost and had to act ghoully, jumped out of windows on to crash mats 30 times one day (That was her favourite), and spent a number of days with real dwarves and giants! You cannot buy that experience and in later life, if she doesn't continue on this current path, she will have some fantastic stories to tell and gained so much confidence that can add value in many ways in the working world.
She does do professional shows as well, having had yes's as well as the turn downs, and I have to say that she has handled the rejections pretty well, and a good stage school will back this up and support them giving them praise just as much as parents.
In summary, we do have to make decisions all along the way with our kids, and at the moment I know what we are doing is right for her, at this moment in time. I think most kids in this industry are there because they love what they do - and I think sometimes it is us parents that view it from a different perspective as their carers. If I to go back and make my choices for my DD again, I would do exactly what I have done to date as she has so much fun and loves every experience.
My DD has been singing, dancing and acting since she was 3 - she is now nearly 9. Up until a couple of years ago, it was purely her stage school shows, or stuff they did in the community or dance festivals. her acting then started to really shine through, so we made a decision for her to remain at the stage school she was at as they are really really strong on dance, and for her to attend a different one for singing, drama and musical theatre. Best of breed approach I suppose.
Her musical theatre stage school acts as a sub agent and is aligned with one of the agencies based in Pinewood., They get lots of 'extras' work as well as the kids going further. From talking with the other parents there and seeing how much fun all the kids had we made the decision for her sign up.
In the last 18 months she has had an absolute ball and it would never even enter her mind that it was 'work'. She has worked with Daniel Radcliffe, done her first screen death, been a ghost and had to act ghoully, jumped out of windows on to crash mats 30 times one day (That was her favourite), and spent a number of days with real dwarves and giants! You cannot buy that experience and in later life, if she doesn't continue on this current path, she will have some fantastic stories to tell and gained so much confidence that can add value in many ways in the working world.
She does do professional shows as well, having had yes's as well as the turn downs, and I have to say that she has handled the rejections pretty well, and a good stage school will back this up and support them giving them praise just as much as parents.
In summary, we do have to make decisions all along the way with our kids, and at the moment I know what we are doing is right for her, at this moment in time. I think most kids in this industry are there because they love what they do - and I think sometimes it is us parents that view it from a different perspective as their carers. If I to go back and make my choices for my DD again, I would do exactly what I have done to date as she has so much fun and loves every experience.